I think “they” is the way to proceed as a default, until English is spoken in a world where the inherent power disparity between the “hes” and “shes” is eradicated. I know it won’t happen in my lifetime, but as long as we continue to use a language that is inherently sexist, we will be forever perpetuating sexist ideology, even without intending to. I still do not know how to talk about this without inspiring fights – but it is an important one.