Pardon my redundancy, but:
• Music is my first language, words my second. At bottom I still think of myself as a musician.
• I’m a pessimist–but an ebullient one.
• I’m a workaholic, but only out of necessity. If I became a rich man tomorrow, I’d probably stop writing for publication as soon as I made all of my outstanding deadlines–though I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t stop blogging or tweeting.
• I love hot dogs, trains, waterfalls, and the lyrics of Johnny Mercer.
• I loathe yappy dogs, preachy art, most of the music of Wagner, and all people who talk loudly on cellphones in public places.
• I’m almost never attracted by conventionally beautiful women. I prefer sharply drawn or “funny” faces, and I can rarely resist a jolie laide.
• With three exceptions, I’ve never been attracted to blondes.
• I am, alas, almost entirely indifferent to my personal appearance.
• I think–perhaps wrongly–that I have a gift for friendship.
• I wish I could live next to the sea.
• I enjoy pretending to be an Anglophobe, especially when in the company of Anglophiles.
• The secret of my literary success (such as it is) is that I write fast, know what I think, and don’t equivocate.
• So long as I didn’t have to lie in print, I’d be perfectly glad never to write another bad review. Nothing makes me happier than to be told that one of my reviews helped a show to sell out.
• Unrequited love’s a bore, and I’ve had it pretty bad.
• I wish I wrote more simply.
• I talk a lot–often too much–but mainly as a tool to figure out what I think. I’d rather listen. (Really.)
• I snore.
• I hate being clumsy, but I’ve learned to live with it.
• Galliard is my favorite typeface.
• I try very hard to be fair.
• I’m not afraid to be wrong–and not unwilling to admit when I am.
• If I had to spend the rest of my life listening to one kind of music, and it couldn’t be classical music or jazz, I’d pick Brazilian music.
• To me, all politicians are guilty until proven innocent, and sometimes even afterward.
• I wish I were funnier, but at least I’m a good audience. Make me laugh and I’ll love you forever.
• I hate clutter.
• I can always watch a film noir or a good western.
• The professional achievement of which I’m proudest is my libretto for Paul Moravec’s The Letter. Pops: A Life of Louis Armstrong comes next.
• I’m also very proud of having written about Diana Krall and Maria Schneider early in their careers.
• I prefer plays to novels. If absolutely necessary, I could go the rest of my life without reading another novel, though I wouldn’t want to.
• That said, the book I most wish I’d written is The Great Gatsby.
• I think The Rules of the Game is the greatest of all movies, Falstaff the greatest of all operas, The Four Temperaments the greatest of all ballets, and David Cromer’s productions of Our Town and The Glass Menagerie the greatest shows I’ve ever seen on stage.
• My top five classical composers are Haydn, Schubert, Ravel, Copland, and Britten. (Note that I didn’t say “greatest”!)
• Jim Hall is my favorite living jazz musician.
• I adore being a critic, but if I could make a decent living working in the theater, I’d do that instead.
• I almost never use semicolons.
• My proudest possession is my Max Beerbohm caricature of Percy Grainger.
• If I could have anybody else’s speaking voice, it’d be James Mason’s.
• If I could play piano like anybody else, it’d be Nat Cole or Ellis Larkins. (I’d happily flip a coin to choose between them.)
• I’m bad with names, and even worse with birthdays.
• Samuel Johnson is my hero.
• I bore easily–too easily.
• I have two mottoes, Always look forward and If there’s no alternative, there’s no problem.
• I fell in love with Mrs. T at first sight.